Dating Safety

Online and in-person safety guidance for And-U members.

Online safety

Profile creation

An online dating profile should be interesting and inviting — but it should not be a way for fraudsters to easily capture detailed information about you. Keep safety in mind when creating yours.

  • Use an appropriate username (don't include personal info)
  • Choose a strong password that is hard to guess
  • Keep personal details (address, workplace, daily routine) private

Safe chat, calls, and emotional safety

Don't rush. Keep conversations on And-U while you get to know someone. Members with bad intentions often try to move the conversation off-platform quickly. Be cautious if someone:

  • Refuses to do a video call
  • Pushes for a serious relationship before meeting
  • Avoids your questions about their life

Long-distance / overseas relationships

Watch out for scammers who claim to be from your country but say they're "stuck" somewhere else and need financial help to return home. This is a classic romance-scam pattern.

Protect personal information

Never share your home or work address, daily routine details, or information about your children (names, schools) with someone you have not met in person.

Report suspicious behavior

Block and report anyone who violates our terms. Examples:

  • Requests for money
  • Harassment or threats
  • Spam or off-platform solicitation

See our Community Guidelines for the full list.

Safety in person

Tell someone your plans

Tell a friend or family member when and where you're meeting your date. Keep your phone charged and on you.

Meet in a public place

Always meet in a populated, public location for the first several dates — never at their home, your home, or any secluded location. If they pressure you to go somewhere private, end the date.

Stay clear-headed

Drugs and alcohol impair judgment. Don't let your date pressure you to drink more than you're comfortable with. End the date if they do.

Control your transportation

Drive yourself or use a ride-share app. Always have a backup plan to leave at any time.

Trust your gut

If you feel uneasy, leave. It's okay to end a date early. Ask a bartender or server for help if you need it.

Watch your drinks and belongings

Only accept drinks poured directly by the bartender. Keep your phone, bag, and wallet on you at all times.

Data security & scammers

Computer, email, and password security

Use a separate email account for online dating. Choose a strong password mixing uppercase, lowercase, numbers, and symbols. A weak password can lead to account hijacking and identity theft.

Sexual health & consent

Protect yourself

Condoms significantly reduce the risk of contracting and transmitting STIs when used correctly and consistently.

Know your status

Not all STIs show symptoms. Get tested regularly to protect yourself and your partners.

Consent

Consent is a clear, freely-communicated agreement. A verbal, affirmative expression of consent helps both parties understand and respect boundaries. Consent can be withdrawn at any time. Do not proceed if your partner seems uncomfortable, unsure, or cannot consent due to drugs or alcohol.

Resources

You're never alone. If something happens, support is available.

United States

  • Sexual assault & violence: RAINN — 800-656-4673 — rainn.org
  • Human trafficking: National Human Trafficking Hotline — 1-888-373-7888
  • Internet crime: FBI IC3 — ic3.gov
  • Suicide prevention: 988 — 988lifeline.org
  • Domestic violence: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) — thehotline.org
  • Crime victim support: 1-855-4VICTIM — victimconnect.org
  • Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741

Canada

  • Crisis services: Talk Suicide Canada — 1-833-456-4566
  • Sexual assault support: Ending Violence Association — endingviolencecanada.org